to my son on his first day of school

You started school. It was only preschool but still my momma heart leaped for joy at how old you are while simultaneously aching at how old you are.

You venture out into a new world today my sweet boy. A place of learning and expanding your mind. A place of sweet new friendships and brand new experiences. I am so so proud of the little boy you are.

But I hope for so much more... and here are just a few of my heart's prayers for you and your younger brother as you both get older

- I pray you will always know the love of your Father.

  Of course I want you both to always experience the love of the your dad but more then that I want you truly know and understand the love that Your Heavenly Father has for you. The infinite love He has for you (John 3:16). The fact that He knew You and set you apart while you were still in my womb (Jeremiah 1:5). Your God knows everything about you, even the numbers of hairs on your head (Luke 12:7). I pray that you will not just know that in your mind but experience that in your heart. That that love will guide you in your life.

- I pray that you will walk with boldness and courage.

 Life can be scary.. I can never downplay that fact. I wish I could take all the evil away in this world but I cannot. Everything from the boogie man in the dark to frightening life events... I would take it all away. But I do not have that power. But you, my precious boy, were not born with a spirit of fear but of a sound mind (2 Timothy 1:7) Declare that over yourself in times you are feeling scared. Walk in the confidence that God has given you. Not in the world's cockiness but in the confidence that only God can give us.

- I pray that you will be a leader.

 You are feisty. You are energetic. You are strong willed. You are determined. All of these things can help you to become an amazing leader in the Kingdom. I hope that these things wont change but that you see the strength in it and that as your mother I can cultivate it well.

- I pray that you always seek compassion.

 From comforting your brother when he is upset to helping me with cleaning, never stop seeking compassion. Keep your heart tender, sweet boy. Don't allow the world, circumstances, relationships, or short comings to harden your heart. I pray that God will always keep your heart soft.

- I pray that no matter what you will desire to serve the Lord.

  One of my largest prayers for you and your brother is that you will not just be a believer of Jesus but a follower of Jesus. Even when its hard. Even when its confusing. Even when you stand alone in the crowd. Lets us not grow weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. (Galatians 6:9) I pray you and your brother will sow goodness and reap goodness.

I love you beyond measure my son. You and your little brother are such a gift to me and I thank God daily that I have the honor and privilege of being your mom.

Always and Forever,

Mom



Fridays Letters

I haven't done one of these in awhile but I thought we should link up with Ashley atThe Sweet Season and write some letters! (:

Dear weekend, I am sooo excited you are here! I never thought that this housecleaning/babysitting job would take so much out of me. I think I will just relax the whole time and sip tea {and clean MY house that looks like a disaster}. Hope you can stay longer this time!

Dear Sophia Belle, I am proud of you that you are now completely house broken!! No accidents in two weeks is a great accomplishment! Now let's work on other things -- like coming when we call your name, not jumping on me, and not eating up the couch! But still... Progress!

Dear Husby, thank you thank you THANK YOU again for the car!!! I am very much looking forward to driving it around more! I am sad that you work tomorrow but at least we will have Sunday to hang out {and cuddle}. You are so good to me and I am so glad that we are taking time to be together before our family grows.

Dear Baby V,  daddy and I should be able to hear your heartbeat and see you next week! We are very very happy! We pray for you every single day. We pray for your well being and that God is already speaking to you as He forms you in my belly! I am already in awe of you, baby!

Dear readers/followers/friends, I am extremely sorry that my posts have been few and far between!!! I know I keep telling you that I am gonna get better and then I never do! Now that I am {almost} out of the first trimester my energy should be coming back - which means I will have the mental capacity to blog again! I appreciate every single one of you and I can't believe I have already surpassed 100 followers! You all encourage and inspire me and I am humbled by you all! Know that even though I haven't been able to post I have been thinking of you and praying for you all. (:

Dear Heavenly Father,  You are so incredibly good! What you are creating in my body leaves me completely speechless and tears start to form in my eyes! Continue to have a hand on this pregnancy and the beautiful little miracle inside of me. Thank you that Your grace and joy are new and available every morning for me, Lord. My heart is ablaze for You. God, burn like a fire in me - for the sake of the world . It has nothing to do with me - but it has EVERYTHING to do with You. I don't want people to look at me and think "oh what a nice girl she is", I want people to think "wow! What does she have that allows her to be the way she is. I want that!".  I do not care if I am popular or doing what everyone else is doing ... I don't need to tip toe the line of 'good and ok' for a Christian. I just want to represent You WELL! This is my hearts cry, God and forgive me for all the times I have not lived up to that. I pray for every one reading this that the fire in their hearts will start to burst into flame and their passion will arise! I declare that Holy Spirit will speak to them and begin to tell them all the things they needed to hear. And I pray for boldness, God! That WE WILL NOT BE SILENT BECAUSE A FIRE BURNS INSIDE US! I love you so much, Lord. Amen

Letters and love. -Monica

SheReadsTruth and praying for friends

Happy Tuesday morning lovelies!

Is anyone else confused with this time change thing?
Usually when my husband goes to work at 5:40 i can go back to sleep.... But i have been staying up since its light out. Then i want to go to bed at like 8:30pm. Hehe.

Who all is participating in #shereadstruth? I am loving this community of woman reading and growing together. {if you do not know what i am talking about check it here. }
Today was day 2 of the new study in Colossians... So if you haven't yet, join! The plan is on youversion on your smart cell. (: There are verses to read and then devotional content. Its impacting my life!

Yesterday we made some pretty powerful proclamations ... And if ton know anything about my church in California (Bethel) you would know we love to proclaim things! (:
I, Monica, have been sent on a special assignment by Christ as part of God's master plan.
Oh... It just empowers me!!! It puts a fire in my heart and a skip in my step. I have a unique calling.
YOU have a calling that is different then anyone elses. (: No one else can do it, but you.

Today we read Colossians 1:2-14 and discussed praying for our friends.
Prayer is so important! I know that i do so much better when i am being covered in prayer. My husband has a better day when i have prayed for him while he is working. The circumstances may be not what you want them... But when you have someone praying for you, your perspective changes. You still have that peace among the storm.
We were encouraged to pray a very uplifting, specific, and personal prayer for our friends and i am praying for every one of you!

Lord, i thank you for every follower and reader. Thank you that they each have a calling and purpose. I pray that You will give them wise minds. Father, i pray that their spirits will be aligned with Your will so they can hear your voice. i pray that they are honoring You with their lives, with their minds and thoughts, and with their bodies. I pray that each person will see their worth and will have a desire to honor their loving God wholeheartedly. Lord i pray that with every good work they do that they will bear many fruit and see that there efforts to do not go unnoticed by You. You see them. I pray that their knowledge of God will increase greatly and they will dream about Your goodness. They will think about.heavenly things and the revelations  flow. Father, i ask that they will be completely strengthened in all power with the endurance that they need and patience with extreme joy. No matter their circumstance. Lord, we are all in different seasons and walks of life but i ask that no matter what is going on that all these beautiful people will realize their inheritance in You and begin to thank you with all that they have. In Jesus Precious Name Amen.

I hope that you all have a happy Tuesday! And thank you all for reading and stopping by! (: (: (:

Prayers and love. - Monica

{also i don't know if my social media buttons are working because i changed my usernames... So now my instagram and twitter are both @Mrsv820. You can also like my Facebook page www.Facebook.com/mrsv820blog }

Changing thoughts

Good morning!!!

thanks for all the ideas of my baby leap list!!!
I am excited to talk to my husband about it more and let you all know my list. (: (:

yesterday was a hard day because Sophia got very very sick. I had to take our poor little puppy into the vet because she was throwing up all morning.
since then she has been sleeping and not really eating or drinking.
the vet did tell us that the shot would make her very very tired. I am hoping that is all it is.
so today is just snuggle day.

I also had my little babysitting job yesterday. it is spirit week at her school and today is superhero day.
we....... well I made her costume.
she is Wonder Woman. (: (:

I found this super cute picture of my husband, sister in law, and brother in law showing off their cool new kicks. He he.

anything you have learned so far this week?

today I feel like I am learning to not give my thoughts over to the enemy.
I have noticed that I can be very anxious ... if I am not aware of my thoughts.
sometimes I can make up whole stories or scenarios in my head and then react on those feelings.
I know that is something I need to pray in to give completely to the Lord.

"Satan wants a foothold so he can get a stronghold. small place that turns into something huge." - this was on Beth Moore's twitter this morning.

I cannot allow the enemy to have a foothold or a stronghold on my thoughts.

Lord, renew my mind. Wash me clean. I know these negative thoughts are not from you and i declare that they will leave now!  I will not be anxious about my future or my marriage because my hope is in you. I trust you with all that i am and i believe in Your promises for my life.
Continue to grow our marriage and conform it to Your will. Be at our center and saturate us with your love. Speak too my and my husbands heart and show us our callings. We will yield to You. We give you praise and honor forever.
In Jesus name. Amen.

if you feel any area in your life that the enemy might have a foothold on, please pray. talk to God and give it back to him. let me know how I can be praying for all of you.

have a happy happy happy Wednesday!

Sick puppy cuddles, restored grace, and love. - Monica

Fighting Insecurity

insecurity: (n)  Lack of confidence or assurance; self-doubt.

I loathe insecurity. I don't like it in myself and it saddens my heart to see it in other people.

I think there are differnt forms of insecurity... but ( I think ) everyone battles them from time to time. There is the insecurity of our looks, our personality, and our abilities. It all comes down to our worth.

Yesterday I was experiencing that self-doubt. I had crazy thoughts going through my head about how I am not accomplished enough, not pretty enough, not thin enough, not Godly enough and I am too emotional, too plain, too boring. So I was feeling not enough and too much at the same time! Wow was I in an unhealthy rollercoaster of emotions.

I kept taking it steps further thinking how my husband would be better off if he had never married me... or married someone else...bla bla bla.

Now, I don't want to write this for anyone to assure me... or feel sorry for me.. or anything like that. I wanted to write this to be REAL.  So if you are feeling anything similar to how I was feeling, you can relate to me and know that you are not alone.

I have had my ups and downs with insecurity. Sometimes when I feel like I have won the battle... another comes along. It is a daily struggle. So DAILY I must choose to come into agreement with what the Lord speaks over me.

Of course the enemy LLOOVEES when we doubt or question ourselves. He takes sheer delight when we go against what the Lord has said to us.
He wants us to feel not good enough, ugly, broken, small, ashamed, confused, too much to deal with, not talented, unaccomplished, and unloved. If he can get us to feel soo terrible about ourselves -- then he is winning. He comes to steal, kill, and destroy. [ John 10:10 ]
He will speak complete lies to you! And THOSE ARE LIES!

Here are some truths--

- You are all together beautiful  [ Song of Solomon 4:7 ]
- God created you and you are fearfully and wonderfully made. [ Psalm 139:13-14 ]
- God thinks you have an unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit. [ 1 Peter 3:3-4 ] 
-  God has great plans for your future filled with hope. [ Jeremiah 29:11 ]
- You can be strong and courageous because the Lord is with you. [ Joshua 1:9 ]
- You have more value then you can imagine. [ Luke 12:7 ]
- Charm and outward beauty will fade over time.. but a woman who fears the Lord should be praised. [ Proverbs 31:30 ]
- God is with you always. He is proud of you and will rejoice over you. He will quiet you with His love and exult over you with singing. [ Zephaniah 3:17 ]

Those are only a FEW of the many many things that the Lord thinks about you. Read them. Memorize them. Put them over our house. On your phone. In your car. Places that you can see them daily and be reminded. Surround yourself with these things - it helps.

When Martin and I were doing long distance I heard one of my pastors say "You are beautiful. You deserve to be pursued. You deserve to be adored." I loved it... so I typed it up and put it on my front seat visor of my car.
I also put the name 'Hephzibah'. Hephzibah is Hebrew for 'My delight is in her'... which is what God called His people in Isaiah 62:4. I wanted to ALWAYS be reminded of this truth.
The other thing I have in my car is a promise from the Lord... which was so appropriate in my time of being away from Martin.
'For the Lord God is a sun and a shield; the Lord will give grace and glory; no good thing will he withhold from those who walk uprightly'. - Psalm 84:11
All three of these are STILL in my car.

When I was at my lowest point and I was really re-building my relationship with the Lord after I fell away, I would put alarms or reminders on my phone to go off every 30-45 minutes that said things like "You are beautiful., You are worthy. You are loved. God is proud of you. You are lovely. You have a destiny."
Now.. for me at the time... I needed the reminders THAT often... but for you.. it may just be once or twice a day. But DO IT!

When self-doubt creeps in about the way that I look now I can remember Proverbs 31:30 that says that beauty is FLEETING. Now, we still need to be healthy.. so eating right (or at least... better lol) and exercising (even if it is chasing 2-yr olds or purposefully parking farther way from the store to walk) are important... but don't STRIVE. Don't create an unhealthy relationship with food. Don't beat yourself up because you don't look like a model -- or even like Susy down the street.
Once I keep in mind that beauty is fleeting (Proverbs 31:30) and that God says that I have an unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit ( 1 Peter 3:3-4) then I can accept the fact that I will never be a size 5 or have a larger chest. I am STILL beautiful!

You are powerful! Look at yourself like this kitten.

Lord, thank you for every single person that is reading this blog right now. God, I pray that you would touch them. Show them their worth. Remind them of the beauty that they posses that is more then hairstyles and jewelry. Thank you that you made all of us unique. That you created us in our mother's womb to be EXACTLY the way that we are. I praise you that every person has a divine future filled with hope and love. Help them to see that, God. I pray that if anyone is dealing with insecurity that they would rebuke that lie and hold tight to YOUR truth about themselves. You created all of us in YOUR image. You are the artist. Jesus is the model. We are the masterpiece. Help us to keep that in mind. Lord, we are sorry for speaking ill of ourselves. For speaking badly of how we look or how we are. We love you so much Lord. We praise Your holy name! We invite you to touch our lives and we submit to Your will. Thank you that YOU take delight in US. 

In Jesus Name. - Amen. 

I hope you all have a lovely day and weekend! 

seeing the lion in the mirror and love. - Monica

♥ . ♥ . ♥ 

Father of Lights

Martin and I had such a wonderful weekend together.

We watched shows, ate delicious food, and watched our California church from our Alabama living room (Soo thankful for live streaming).

Last night our church did a premiere of the Darren Wilson documentary 'Father of Lights'. Darren Wilson is the producer of Wanderlust Productions. He is an amazing and extremely talented man of God. He has also made the film 'Finger of God' documenting God's miraculous power all across the world and the 'sequel' 'Furious Love' about the extreme love of God. This third film 'Father of Lights' is all about Father God and how he is the light in dark places.  

It was so incredibly impacting! The movie is not set to release until October 2012 but we got blessed to watch it before. Our church is playing it live for 2 more days on ibethel.tv so if you want to.. check it out.

We are called to be light in dark places. We, as Christians, need to show the love of the Father to all people that we come into contact with. We need to have a life-changing encounter with Father God.

Father, I pray for everyone reading this right now. I pray for a true encounter with their heavenly Father. I pray that you would touch any past hurt from their earthly father that would distort their vision of You, God. Lord, touch any area where the church has told them that you are angry or scary or just want to smite them. God, you are so good and love Your children. You adore each and every one of them and You just want to love on them. Lord, I pray that they can accept that free love that you want to shower upon them. God, I just pray for fresh encounters of the Father's love. I pray that every person will discover a deep passion inside of them to be a light. Lord, we are the light. Help us to see opportunities to be that light. 

In Jesus Name, Amen

light in the darkness, and love. - Monica

♥ . ♥ . ♥ . 

50 Shades & Magic Mike

 I recently came across a link on my Facebook to a blog talking about the book 50 Shades of Grey  and the movie 'Magic Mike'.
If you do not know what they are -  'Magic Mike' is a new movie in theaters about male strippers and 50 Shades of Grey is the first installment of a trilogy of erotic novels.

It seems that so many women are talking about how "good" these are. I have no desire to watch or read them. 

If you have not yet read the blog (50 Shades of Magic Mike by MelissaJenna) please do so.
She writes it so raw and so real.. and SOO truthful. 

I think that it is so important, as Christian woman, to be a standard and to not go along with what everyone else is doing and what is popular. We need to guard our eyes since they are the window to the soul.

I always tell my husband that people know I am married not by the ring on my finger but by the way I am. I made it a priority in my marriage to continue purity. To stay pure to my husband and to my Lord. And that is including the things that I watch or put into my mind.
I am a Christian wife and I want others to see that about me when they first come into contact with me. Not to build up myself but to give glory and honor to the Lord.

I am completely 100% faithful to my husband with every single part of me. I cherish my relationship with my husband and God. I believe that it is worth fighting for.

What do you guys think?

Lord, I pray for every person reading this blog right now. I pray that you would speak to their hearts and comfort them. I pray protection over all the husbands and wives (and future husbands and wives). Jesus, give them a fresh touch and help them to guard their hearts. 

I declare a new standard of purity in the lives of Your people. Father, give us clean hands and pure hearts. Not because we are better but because we are Yours. Lord I pray for a "honeymoon" feeling for everyone reading this prayer right now. That they would fall even deeper in love with their spouse and most importantly with their first love - You.  I honor You today God and I thank you for marriages. For that beautiful union. In Jesus Name. - Amen

setting a new standard and love, Monica
♥ . ♥ . ♥

creatures of emotion

I am back in the great state of Alabama! I am very happy to be back too. I had a wonderful time visiting with my family and seeing my niece graduate but I did miss home.

I had every intention of writing all about my Cali adventure and posting tons and tons of pictures of my trip and my family -- but after 3 different conversations about emotions in the past week (2 from today) I decided to change courses. (But I will let you all know about my trip... eh.. well here is a teaser. [;  )

- . - . - . - .

I think I have always been a very emotional person. I cry pretty much with every emotion. Sadness. Anger. Frustration. Even joy. I guess I just need to let it out in some way. I feel if I don't let it out that I will just burst!

I know that not everyone is like me and they do not like to cry or even FEEL emotion. This truly saddens my heart.
I think that it is very import to feel whatever it is that you are feeling. Not act out on that feeling (Ephesians 4:26 tells us to be angry and sin not) but feel it.
It actually hurts us when we bottle up our emotion. There are tons of research linking bottled emotions to health problems. Not crying it out is literally making people feel sick!

I have always kept a journal since I can really remember. I write what I am feeling in that moment -- happy, sad, confused, angry, content, excited, anything. I do not sugar coat or belittle anything that I am feeling. I choose to just feel. Sometimes it hurts. At times it felt like I could never see past the pain... but I did. I got through it. I felt what I needed to feel and got through the end of it. Now I have countless victories in writing.

Do not ignore your feelings. Don't diminish them or belittle them. Its okay to be sad or grieve. Its okay to be mad. Or upset. Or even confused. Let it out. Journal. Cry. Scream into your pillow. Paint. Pray. Run.
If you need to talk to someone -- find a person who will let you feel everything you need to.
And if you know someone who needs to talk.. let them express themselves. Don't tell them to be less emotional and quiet their feelings.
[Remember that when you are being self destructive or hurting others with your words and actions -- that is not "letting the emotion out". That is letting the emotional control you. Do not do anything in the emotion that you would later regret out of the emotion.]

So if you are happy - smile. If you are sad - shed a tear. If you are mad - yell at the air. We are not robots -- we are people. (:

Lord, bless everyone who is reading this blog right now. Father help them to feel again. You have given us all emotions and it is okay to feel... even the not-so-fluffy feelings. Help us to encourage others to do the same and not to write people off as "babies" or "wussies" because they are able to feel those God-given emotions. Lord, even in Your Word it says that you too felt anger, sadness, and joy. Thank you Lord that you love us unconditionally and that You are a beautiful example of an emotion being.  In Jesus Name, - Amen.

feeling everything and love. - Monica
♥ . ♥ . ♥

I love Titus

This was my morning today. The Word and some coffee (and hubby too).

I have been intrigued by the teachings in Titus for quite some time. There is so much that captivates my heart in those verses.

Titus 3 says that we (believers) were once filled with lots of ugliness but because God was so merciful He saved us and filled us with His beauty (my overly romantic paraphrasing right there).

I could read that over and over again and continue to be reminded of the love that God poured out for me. I read that and feel encouraged to continue to flee from my previous ugliness.

Lord, thank you for giving Your Son so that I may have abundant life. Thank you that because of the grace that you have freely given me that I have the ability to walk away from my past foolishness. Thank You for Your love and kindness and I pray that praise will always be on my lips.

Grace, beauty in my heart, and love. - Monica

♥ . ♥ . ♥

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encouraging him encourages me

Martin's first day of work was today. He is still working right now and won't be home for a couple more hours

I packed his lunch last night since we had to get up this morning at 4:30am. He left for work at 5:30am. Uh! So early.

I read in a book ( I cannot remember at the moment.. but I am THINKING it was Saving Your Marriage Before it Starts by Les and Leslie Parrott) that one wife would write her husband little notes with bible verses and leave them in his lunches for work. I liked loved that idea! I started writing encouraging notes to my husband quickly after we got married and I noticed a difference in myself.
It enabled me to actively think positive about my husband and purposefully search out a verse for him. It got me closer to my husband and closer to God. While I was encouraging my husband, I found that I also was feeling uplifted. Speaking of my husband's worth reminded me of the many reasons why I fell in love with him. It made me proud of to be his wife. I felt honored that the Lord entrusted me to partner my life with this man. It made me want to do more to help him feel loved and appreciated.

How better is the day when you get complimented? Or when you feel lovely? Or appreciated?
My husband works hard. In the sun. Outside. In a new situation. With new people. I hope my simple note and constant reminder of the Word puts a smile on his face, even if it is only for the one moment of reading it. Just like it does to me as I write it.

It feels good to encourage someone and to bless someone... especially when that someone is your husband. (:

Try it out.... see what happens. See if it changes the way you think toward your spouse (or roommate, or mom, or sibling). 

Father, thank You that You are constantly encouraging me. Lord, I pray that I will recognize times when someone needs to feel loved and encouraged. I pray that Holy Spirit will give me words to say, or type, or write to that person to give them what they need in that moment. 

Lord, I pray for the person receiving the encouragement, that they would be able to open the hearts. That they could receive it freely as I freely give it to them... just as you have freely given Yourself to me. God, thank You that every single day is a blessing. 

In Jesus name - AMEN.

encouraging love. - Monica
&hearts ; . ♥ . ♥

Day four. Texas to Oklahoma

We got into Oklahoma yesterday. It was our shortest drive. We are visiting my family for a few days. (: Another blessed day of driving.

Lord, I praise You again for protecting my husband and I. Continue to bless our time and vehicle. (: In Jesus Name Amen.

Family time and love. - Monica

♥ . ♥ . ♥

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Day 2. So cal to Arizona

Day two was amazing! Our car is running great and we ate amazing Mexican food. (: enjoy the pics and captions to come later. (:

God, thank you again for a beautiful day of traveling with my husband. We praise You for getting us to Arizona safely. Lord, bless our car today as we set out for the longest stretch. Surround our car with your angels and protect our vehicle. Bless this day, God. Bless my husband as he drives the first half of the day... give him strength and endurance. Prepared road before us. I declare safe travels for my little family. In Jesus Name - Amen.

More traveling love. - Monica

♥ . ♥ . ♥

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Our journey begins!

As I type this my hubby is driving. We are headed to our first stop in Southern California.

We bought our starbucks, gassed up, got everything in the car (after purging a lot.. and deciding "well.. we can buy oh when we get there.") and now we are off. (:

Father, I pray that You are preparing the way for us. I declare that angels surround our vehicle and protect every inch of our car. Lord, I pray that my husband and I will glorify you in our attitudes and speech. I pray that throughout this long trip we will take the extra moment to respond instead of react. That we will choose to love and respect one another.

Thank you for this fun and exciting opportunity in our lives. We give you all the honor and glory.

In Jesus Name -Amen.

Driving, starbucks, and love. -Monica

♥ . ♥ . ♥

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Hope and prayer

With all the stresses of trying to find a place to live in Alabama and all the opposition I am facing for this decision I am so glad that my hope and faith is found in the Lord.

If you are facing trouble (large or small) please don't stop hoping or praying.

Remember that you have a God who loves you deeply and who has a divine plan for you. (:

More hope and love. -Monica

♥ . ♥ . ♥

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