Saturday, July 28, 2018

some thoughts on guarding your heart



Guard your heart  for it is the well spring of life. - Proverbs 4:23

I know this biblical truth.
I understand it in my head and I believe it in my heart.

But... how to apply it practically -- I've got nothing.

Now that I am in this dating scene this whole concept of  "guarding your heart" has taken a new role and meaning.
I know I should want to go into things with no expectations. Not get my hopes up. Enjoy it for what it is.

But you know how that makes me feel...like my feelings are bad. That having hope is wrong. And that intention should be thrown out because we have zero expectations.

Not fair.

Where is the line in having hope for more and going into a situation expecting nothing?
Because sorry.... expecting nothing is not going to get me out of my messy bun and yoga pants for the day. I will just not waste my make up and enjoy some Gilmore Girls in the comfort of my home if I am going to get the same results.

I understand being cautious.
And i do think that it isn't wise to go into every date thinking you will meet your spouse. I mean, how exhausting would that be for our minds and hearts?
But is it bad to have some hope for a future with someone?
It just feels so strange to push away our feelings for the sake of keeping our hearts guarded.
Do we keep our hearts closed off?
Relationships come down to a pro/con list as we all search for our unicorn? We remove our feelings so that we don't get confused.

Or can it be both?

Is it possible that we can enjoy our feelings and still guard that well spring of life?

I know that nowadays "catching feelings" is seen as such a negative thing. I have conversations with both males and females who are dating and they question whether to tell the other person how they feel. So then the alternative is to dissect and over analyze. We end up over thinking and reading between the lines. Which usually leaves us confused, broken, and tired.
What would it look like if we didn't look at feelings like they were a bad thing... but we looked at them like they were a gift from God. How different would relationships look like if we could just be honest with ourselves and the people we are dating?

This whole passivity things has to end.

Lets be bold about our feelings.

Don't push them out because it isn't the popular thing or you are worried how the other person will take it.

Yes, be wise. Pray. Pause. Think about why you like that person. Have boundaries early on. Be open to all the amazing things that God has in store for you. Enjoy the journey.

But lets not stuff those feelings down any longer.

feelings, dating, and love,
Monica